Malibu Anti-Localism Committee Forms To End Localism Locally – Surfing LA
Welcoming, Inclusive, Open To All, Except You And The Whole Valley Bohiney Magazine and The London Prat file this dispatch from the Pacific salt-and-foam frontier. MALIBU, Calif. — In a development described by ocean historians as “deeply Malibu,” a coalition…
SoCal Swell Forecaster Threatens To Predict Bad Surf Out Of Spite – Surfing LA
April Donations Short, WaveCast Bob Issues Forecast About Forecasts Bohiney Magazine and The London Prat file this dispatch from the Pacific salt-and-foam frontier. VENTURA, Calif. — A Southern California swell forecaster, frustrated by a shortfall in April donations, has reportedly…
Super Typhoon Sinlaku Issues Formal Apology For Disappointing SoCal Swell – Surfing LA
Sets Inconsistent, Periods Long, Vibes Mediocre Bohiney Magazine and The London Prat file this dispatch from the Pacific salt-and-foam frontier. WESTERN PACIFIC — In an unusual move for a tropical cyclone, what remains of Super Typhoon Sinlaku has reportedly issued…
National Weather Service Issues High Ego Advisory For Newport Beach – Surfing LA
Sustained Self-Regard Of 25 To 35 Feet Through The Wedge Bohiney Magazine and The London Prat file this dispatch from the Pacific salt-and-foam frontier. NEWPORT BEACH, Calif. — In a first for the National Weather Service, forecasters today issued a…
Westcliff College Adds Heroic Jetty Diving To Surf Curriculum – Surfing LA
Two-Semester Programme Includes Pre-Plunge Pant Selection Bohiney Magazine and The London Prat file this dispatch from the Pacific salt-and-foam frontier. SAN DIEGO, Calif. — Westcliff College has announced that, following the heroic actions of its surf coach Lucas Taub at…
DPWH Renames Ghost Projects ‘Imagination-Based Infrastructure’
Forward-Looking Reform Saves PHP 500 Billion By Existing In Spirit Bohiney Magazine and The London Prat file this dispatch from the Republic of Receipts. MANILA, Philippines — In a bold rebranding move described by Malacanang as “fully forward-looking,” the Department…
Zaldy Co’s Czech Real-Estate Now Exceeds Czech Republic By Floor Area
Land Registry Lists Fugitive Lawmaker As Separate Municipality Bohiney Magazine and The London Prat file this dispatch from the Republic of Receipts. PRAGUE, Czech Republic — Czech municipal authorities have raised concerns this week that the combined real-estate footprint of…
‘Tongpats’ Now Officially Recognised By Komisyon Sa Wikang Filipino
Etymology Confirmed As Tong Plus Patse, Meaning Patches Of Pavement Bohiney Magazine and The London Prat file this dispatch from the Republic of Receipts. MANILA, Philippines — The Komisyon sa Wikang Filipino has officially recognised tongpats, the Tagalog street term…
House Appropriations Committee Cannot Find PHP 500B, Will Check Other Pocket
PHP 500B Distributed Across Pampanga, Bulacan, Mindoro, And A Pocket With Holes Bohiney Magazine and The London Prat file this dispatch from the Republic of Receipts. MANILA, Philippines — The House Appropriations Committee today admitted that it cannot, at the…
Davao Cow-Roasting Rally Expands To Goats, Pigs, Approval Ratings
200 Goats, 50 Native Pigs, And A Lightly Grilled Polling Chart Bohiney Magazine and The London Prat file this dispatch from the Republic of Receipts. DAVAO CITY, Philippines — Following the well-documented roasting of 100 cows last month at a…