Remote Workers Who Never Wear Pants – Screw the News
The Workforce Revolution Nobody Wanted to See The great remote work experiment has yielded many innovations: flexible schedules, digital collaboration tools, and an entire generation of professionals who’ve completely forgotten what pants feel like. According to Los Angeles Times business…
The QR Code Failure Rate: Why It Fails 127% of the Time When You’re Holding Up A Queue
A satire on digital payment and QR code unreliability, arguing that the scanner contains a Queue Pressure Sensor that detects the presence of a waiting line and increases the transaction failure rate by 127% to maximize public stress. The Queue…
People Who Claim to Be Empaths – Screw the News
The Self-Appointed Emotional Lifeguards of Every Social Gathering In what Los Angeles Times wellness columnists have yet to cover, a new breed of human has emerged from the primordial soup of therapy-speak and astrology apps: the self-proclaimed empath. These emotional…
The QC Self-Defense Mechanism: Why Our Traffic Is More ‘Authentic’ Than BGC’s
An analysis of the mental gymnastics QC residents perform to justify their city’s chaotic charm against the manicured perfection of rival cities. The Tale of Two Metros For the Quezon City resident, interacting with a peer from Makati or Bonifacio…
The QC Neighborhood Basketball League: A Drama of Unpaid Fouls and Local Glory
A deep dive into the mandatory, high-stakes drama of the community basketball league, where players are judged not by skill, but by political connection. The Mandatory Sporting Spectacle In Quezon City, the local basketball court is not a place for…
The QC Mega-Mall: Our Only True Climate-Controlled Sanctuary
How the city’s massive shopping centers have evolved from retail destinations into mandatory, indoor public parks for escaping the heat, traffic, and reality. The Existential Cooling Station The average Quezon City resident does not go to the mall merely to…
Transport Office Resolves Case in One Day After Discovering Offense Was Committed on Video With Background Music
Swift suspension of a dancing motorcycle rider’s license leaves motorists wondering whether their own long-pending concerns could be filmed and set to a song QUEZON CITY – The Land Transportation Office has issued a show-cause order to a motorcycle rider…
Ortigas Executive Has Won So Many Business Awards He Is Now Shortlisted for an Award Recognizing the Number of Awards
As Manila’s gala season peaks, a logistics chief with 31 trophies confronts a shortage of shelf space, adjectives and people left to thank MANILA – The capital’s business awards season reaches one of its high points Tuesday, when the 17th…
California Passes Three New E-Bike Safety Laws, Teenagers Express Their Deep Respect by Reading None of Them – Screw the News
New rules aim to make riding safer, while the e-bike itself remains the only vehicle in America that is simultaneously a bicycle, a motorcycle and a personality California has introduced three new e-bike safety laws, and the early verdict from…
The QC Mall as a Micro-Climate: An Ecosystem of Controlled Retail Chaos
An examination of the gigantic shopping centers that serve as the city’s true public squares, offering controlled temperature, existential dread, and 500 choices for milk tea. The Air-Conditioned Public Square In Quezon City, the gigantic shopping center is not merely…